Get ready to unleash your inner cashmere-clad chaos agent, as the infamous Goat Simulator series has made its way to mobile devices with the latest installment, Goat Simulator 3. This ridiculously entertaining game has already captured the hearts of PC and console gamers, but the question remains: can it successfully translate its absurd antics to the smaller screens of iOS devices? In this review, we’ll delve into the world of Goat Simulator 3 on mobile, exploring what works, what doesn’t, and whether this offbeat game can still bring the laughs and the fun, even in the palm of your hand.
Gameplay and Controls
Playing Goat Simulator 3 on mobile feels like trying to tame a wild beast – it’s exciting at first, but the experience can quickly turn messy. The touchscreen controls, although well-intentioned, struggle to replicate the precision and finesse of their PC and console counterparts. The game attempts to mitigate this with three distinct control layouts: ‘Classic ‘, ‘Floating Stick’, and ‘Floating Buttons’. However, no matter which layout players choose, they will encounter some degree of frustration.
During gameplay, camera control can be particularly problematic, as the on-screen stick is finicky and difficult to grasp. To make matters worse, there’s no option to adjust the sensitivity of the controller. As a result, players will have to adapt to the pre-set sensitivity levels, which can lead to frustration during intense gameplay moments. The following is a list of issues that often arise with controls in the iOS version:
| Issue | Description |
|---|---|
| Unresponsiveness | Delays between button presses and in-game actions. |
| Clumsy camera control | Difficulty navigating the camera due to finicky on-screen sticks. |
| Lack of customization options | No options to adjust controller sensitivity or layout. |
- Difficulty performing precision jumps due to unresponsive touchscreen.
- Choppy movement when navigating the environment.
A Mildly Frustrating Experience
The lack of customization options in the mobile version of ‘Goat Simulator 3’ might put off a few enthusiasts. For instance, the graphics quality and sound options, which are easily accessible in the PC version, are somewhat limited in the mobile version, forcing players to adjust to a moderate graphics quality setting. Furthermore, the phone’s processor can heat up significantly during extended periods of play, causing it to slow down or even reset in some cases.
This becomes a more pressing concern during more demanding scenes, such as driving a car or triggering a series of absurd goat-powered contraptions. Notably, playing on a lower graphics quality setting for an extended period helps alleviate this, though at the cost of picture quality. Also, turning down the sound or using headphones helps in dissipating heat more efficiently. It’s also worth suggesting that, until an official optimization patch is released, the best hope for iOS users might be to check the game requirements and reduce graphic settings before launching.
Hilarious Goat Antics
Chaos in the Streets
The game truly shines when it comes to causing chaos and destruction. Players can expect to spend hours roaming the map, smashing into objects, and sending civilians running for their lives. With an array of goat abilities at their disposal, such as tongues that can grab objects and a ‘BASH’ attack that sends enemies flying, players can let their creativity run wild. Some of the most entertaining moments come from simply engaging with non-playable characters (NPCs) and observing their reactions to the antics.
| Most entertaining ways to cause chaos: | Level of destruction: |
|---|---|
| Destroying a gas pump, only to watch as a series of explosions follow. | $text-align: 9/10 |
| Crashing a plane into a city building. | $text-align: 7.5/10 |
| Playing a prank on an NPC, leading to a never-ending chain reaction of dominoes. | $text-align: 8.5/10 |
The destructive behavior seems to take precedence over the game’s narrative and mission objectives. While there’s a storyline present with various tasks to complete, the most enjoyment stems from experimenting with and using the goat abilities in ridiculous ways.
Visually Stunning but Clunky
At first glance, the mobile port of Goat Simulator 3 is a masterclass in visuals. The game’s vibrant colors and wacky character designs pop on smaller screens, with even the most mundane environments transformed into visually stunning playgrounds. However, when you start to play, the cracks begin to show. Frames drop, the game stutters, and even simple actions like movement become clunky and unresponsive at times.
While the mobile version of the game is still fun, these technical issues detract from the overall experience. Here are some of the key issues we encountered during our playtime:
- Severe frame drops in areas with high levels of activity
- Long loading times between levels
- Some actions feel delayed or unresponsive
It’s worth noting that these issues are not exclusive to the mobile version. However, they are much more noticeable on iOS due to the less powerful hardware compared to PC and console versions.
| Platform | Frame Rate | Loading Time |
|---|---|---|
| PC | 60 FPS+ | 5-10 seconds |
| Consoles | 30-60 FPS | 10-15 seconds |
| iOS | 20-30 FPS | 15-30 seconds |
Mobile Exclusive Features
Goat Simulator 3 on mobile devices comes with several fun mobile-exclusive features. Here’s what you can expect:
* Daily rewards with customisation options for your in-game goat
* Leaderboards that rank players based on traversal and destruction feats
* Special events that offer unique rewards for completing objectives in a limited time
* Mobile–friendly controls with adjustments to optimise movement and actions for smaller screens
The mobile-exclusive features are a nice addition, but it’s worth noting the limitations in terms of control options. However, accessibility options have been included to improve overall player experience:
[table]
| Accessibility Options | Options Description | Assists Players With |
| Colour Blind Mode | Colour adjustments for gameplay | Improved visual abilities for players with colour sensitivity |
| Vibration Controls | Mobile-based controller vibrations | Enhanced experience for players using mobile controllers |
[/table]
Sontrol Options Need Improvement
The mobile version of Goat Simulator 3 often falls short in terms of controls. Unlike its console and PC counterparts, which offered more intuitive controls, the mobile version can be quite finicky.
Here are some control options that need to be revised:
- Touch controls that can sometimes register incorrect inputs
- Limited customization options for button layout and sensitivity
- No support for external controllers such as gamepads or keyboards
The lack of precision and responsiveness in the touch controls can make certain tasks and puzzles more frustrating than they need to be. Furthermore, the inability to customize the controls to suit individual preferences can be a significant drawback for some players.
| Control Option | Rating |
| Default Touch Controls | 6/10 |
| Button Layout Customization | 4/10 |
| External Controller Support | N/A |
The ratings above reflect the overall control experience in the mobile version of Goat Simulator 3. While it is still possible to have fun with the game, the wonky controls can sometimes detract from the overall experience.
A Different Approach to Goat Simulation
While some gamers might find Goat Simulator 3 on mobile to be an enjoyable experience, others might not appreciate the challenges that come with playing on a smaller screen. Where the PC version of Goat Simulator 3 offers an almost limitless amount of possibilities for exploration and destruction, the mobile version falls short in this regard. Controlling the goat can be somewhat clumsy, especially when trying to perform more complex actions.
Differences in Gameplay
The mobile version, in comparison, lacks a bit of pizzazz, and that is largely due to the limited space and the inevitable compromises in the visuals to accommodate the mobile format. Here are some of the main differences:
| PC Version | Mobile Version | |
| Graphics Quality | HD, with detailed textures and models | Lower graphics quality, with less detailed textures and models |
| Controller Support | Full controller support | No controller support |
Challanges and Progression System
One of the most significant changes in Goat Simulator 3 is its more streamlined approach to challenges and progression. Gone are the days of aimlessly wandering around, completing random tasks for the sake of points. Instead, the game provides a more structured experience, with clear objectives and rewards for completion. This shift in design makes it easier to track your progress and feel a sense of accomplishment as you work towards unlocking new items and upgrades.
This new approach is reflected in the game’s Score Challenges system, where players earn points for completing specific tasks, such as head-butting a certain number of objects or completing a mini-game within a set time limit. These challenges can be found on the in-game map, and earning high scores will net you rewards, such as customization items or new goats to play as.
Types of Challenges:
- Score Challenges
- Exploration Challenges
- Quest Challenges
Reward Tiers:
| Tier | Description |
|---|---|
| Gold | Unique cosmetics and customization items |
| Silver | Unlockable goats and skins |
| Bronze | In-game currency and boosters |
In Retrospect
As you put down your iOS device and walk away from the chaotic world of Goat Simulator 3, you can’t help but wonder what could’ve been. A game that managed to break free from the chains of sanity and unleash a whole new level of absurdity, now feels slightly restrained by the limitations of mobile gaming. While it’s still an enjoyable experience, the magic of Goat Simulator 3 is somewhat lost in translation. Nevertheless, if you’re a fan of the series or just looking for a quick, quirky distraction, this mobile port is worth a try. Just don’t expect it to be the ‘baaa’-ddest time you’ll ever have – you might need to wait for a console or PC experience to get the full dose of goat madness.
